Mysterious Stranger
by Farrahtink
Summary: AU: He is a famous author with writers block. She is a high school student desperate to be free. Apart, they walk a bitter path. Together they hold the answers to all of their questions. Eclare
1. Chapter 1

**So this is my attempt at an Eclare fanfiction. I know there is probably tons like it, but I have my own ideas and things I want to happen so I hope you guys like it. This will be a long fic! Here we go.**

He banged away angrily at his keyboard. He hadn't written so much as a sentence in the past month. He couldn't focus. He had no muse. He had no drive. If this kept up E. J. Gold would never sell another book. He stood up angrily, the confines of his room suddenly suffocating. He decided he wanted to go for a walk.

Pulling on a black hoodie, grey skinny jeans, and dark aviators. With his hood up he took the city streets. The walk did him little good. The city didn't feel like home, it felt empty, lonely. He had been here for around six months and although he was happy with the move, right now the city felt overbearing and depressing.

His feet continued to pound the sidewalk, harder, faster.

"Hey sugar, you looking for something?" The dark skinned girl crept out of the corner, a gold bikini top, black mini skirt, and white knee high boots left no question in his mind about what she thought he was looking for.

"No, but thank you," he responded politely. His legs walked on. He was on autopilot. His body had carried him to where he wanted to go, before he even realized he wanted to go there. His finger pressed lightly on the buzzer and heard the buzz respond back. He climbed the stairs too impatient to wait for the elevator. He was pleased to find the door unlocked waiting for him. He walked into the apartment.

"Adam," He said, and as he said it he felt some of the tension drop from his shoulders. He sat down after grabbing a beer from the fridge. Adam grabbed a beer from the fridge and sat down too.

"Eli, what can I do for you?" Adam responded. He looked at his friend and saw as he removed his aviators, the bags under his eyes. He looked like hell. "Having a rough time with the new book?"

"It's moving slower than molasses. I just can't find any inspiration." Eli admitted bitterly. He took a long swig of his beer.

"Maybe you need a new muse, dude. When was the last time you were out on a date?" Adam was teasing now, but the prospect of getting his friend back into the dating scene was making him excited.

"Oh you know, since well, since Julia." Eli said, slightly embarrassed.

"Three years man? That's pathetic. Get it together! You could have any girl you wanted Mr. E.J. Gold," Adam was teasing now, but the light playful banter was actually helping Eli.

"Well any girl who reads my books," Eli responded, pointing out a fact.

"Even better! You know they have good taste in literature! And that they're smart!" Adam was smiling now. Eli gave him a smirk.

"I guess, but I don't know. I don't want someone to want me just because I'm EJ Gold. I want some to want me because of Eli Goldsworthy." He sighed. He finished the first beer and stood up to take another.

"You'll find someone man, I promise. Keep your chin up and get writing. After Stalker Angel and Night Wing you've got to top yourself with something big." Eli glared at him, "But you know, no pressure."

"Thanks Adam, I guess I just needed to see a familiar face as well." _Familiar face… _ Eli's mind started working thoughtfully. Maybe all he needed was someone he knew, someone who he had known before…

**XXXXXXXXXXXX**

She walked down to the park, eyeing her favorite bench, her book in hand. It was worn and falling apart from being read so many times. It was her favorite book and she knew she needed a new copy but she couldn't bring herself to part from this book that had brought her through so many memories.

_I beg for her forgiveness, I need her love, I am dying without her love. And oh what is this love that I feel if it is not returned, for I am nothing. I am a street urchin, I am the lowest of the low. And yet… and yet I beg for her! For her love, her body, her life! I beg for all that she has to give and to give her all that I am. I beg for her, and yet she knows not even my name._

Her heart swooned as the words flew off the page coming to life around her. Bringing her into the world of Megan and John, into their fluid beauty. Away from the hell that spiraled around her, threatening to overcome her.

It was dark when she finally forced herself to walk home. It was empty, what a surprise. She did not eat dinner, ignoring that stabbing feeling in her stomach as she skipped the meal. She trudged her feet up the stairs and opened up her best friend, her laptop. Seeking refuge in the internet was not surprising, but it was not as satisfying as everyone made it seem. It was just as lonely, only this time, there was a white screen in front of you. She logged onto her IM account unsurprised to see that no one was online. It was a Friday night after all, why would anyone be logged on anyway.

She attempted to do my homework, typing away furiously at the big report she had due later in the week. It was better to get it done now, rather than later and it gave her something to do. She became so absorbed in her work that she didn't even realize that she had received an IM.

**BackwoodsBhandari:** Hey girlie, how you doin?

**Clare-Bear22:** Ehh same old same old you?

**BackwoodsBhandari:** Had a good night last night. Dave and I hung out as friends hbu?

**Clare-Bear22:** Read my book at the park. Nothing new. Miss you Alli

**BackwoodsBhandari: **I miss you too Clare, we'll hang out soon. I'm taking a trip to go look at some colleges out West this weekend, so maybe next weekend? You and me?

Clare sighed, so she was going to be completely alone all weekend, well she should be used to it by now.

**Clare-Bear22:** Sounds good have a good weekend!

**BackwoodsBhandari:** You too baby girl. Love ya! Xoxoxo

_**BackwoodsBhandari has exited the chat.**_

"Shoot!" Clare yelled quickly clicking back on Alli's name trying to get her before she logged off.

**Clare-Bear22:** WAIT ALLI!

Clare impatiently waited at the keyboard waiting for Alli to respond. She didn't, already gone to be absorbed back into her own life. Clare sighed sadly. Alone again.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

The truth was, finding a familiar face was a lot easier said than done. It was after realizing he was 500 miles away from home with the only familiar face being the one he had just seen. With hesitation and almost resolve to try to talk to at least one other person from back home he signed into his old screen name.

Stupidity hits hard, like a ton of bricks.

There was no one on line. He looked at the time. Nine o'clock on a Friday night. He had been stupid to think that someone would be sitting around on a Friday just staring at their computer screen. He had been a freak even in high school so of course he did that, but he had always been writing then anyway. Then, one of the icons of his contacts lit up.

_**Clare-Bear22 has signed on**_

He tried to remember a Clare from his high school days, but only one little girl came to mind. A kind of chubby girl with long hair and glasses. Eli was about to sign off when he looked at the blank manuscript in front of him. He was desperate.

**BlackEG33:** Hey

Hey? That was the best the famous author could do. _HEY!_ Eli looked at the screen almost praying she wouldn't respond and then hoping she did.

**Clare-Bear22:** Uhm, Hi?

His heart leapt when she responded. He could talk to her.

**BlackEG33: **What's up?

Wow. He sounded so cool. He quickly clicked on her profile picture. She was the same girl, but she looked entirely different. She had short curly hair now, no glasses that drew the attention away from her pretty blue eyes, and now he wondered why he had ever thought her chubby. She was very pretty.

**Clare-Bear22:** Uhm, nothing much? Hbu?

**BlackEG33:** Nothing just doing some work.

Well that wasn't very helpful Eli thought angrily, how was she going to respond to that.

**Clare-Bear22:** Same I have a big English report due on Monday that I need to get done. It's on Authors of the 21st century.

So she was into English… interesting.

**BlackEG33:** That sounds like a better report than the one have to do. Who are you doing your report on?

He was cocky to think it would be him. Had he really gotten so big headed that he would automatically assume she was writing about him?

The answer was yes.

**Clare-Bear22: **It's about Stephenie Meyer.

His heart thudded to the floor. This girl was like every other girl out there. Just jumping on a bandwagon. She clearly didn't know true literature.

**BlackEG33:** What about her?

**Clare-Bear22:** It's about how she had such a major impact in such a short time on so many people. How she was able to generate so much wealth and accumulate so much fame but how that changed on the drop of a dime and moved to hate and disregard. It's not an appreciation piece but more about the effect the media can have on young girls. I don't really mind her writing, but she's not a "classic author" by any means. She's more angled towards younger kids anyway. She's nothing compare to my favorite author though.

Eli smacked himself in the head. He was an asshole. He automatically had judged this girl based on one person she chose to write about. He felt the dunce now, but his curiosity was peaked again.

**BlackEG33:** Who is your favorite author?

His heart thudded slightly with anticipation as he awaited to hear what she said.

**Clare-Bear22:** EJ Gold.

He punched the air happily.

**BlackEG33:** Why is he your favorite?

Now he was just fishing for the compliments.

**Clare-Bear22:** Just the way he writes, I can relate to it so much. I'm sad he hasn't come out with a new book in a while. I have read his other 2 to death. I'm patient though.

**BlackEG33: **He is a pretty good writer, that's really good insight. Thanks Clare :) I've got to go.

**Clare-Bear22:** Wait before you leave! What's your name, I have had this screen name for forever and I can't remember who you are.

Eli hesitated for a minute before decided.

**BlackEG33: **Eli. Bye, good luck on your assignment.

_**BlackEG33 has signed off.**_

He moved quickly to his notebook next to his bed. His mind moving too quickly for his fingers.

_Who was she? Who was this girl he had never seen before. Who was she and what was she doing here? Where had she come from? She looked like something straight out of his nightmare. Yet he wanted to know her. He wanted to know what she wanted and her name. For the face he had seen could not match what he had dream. She was a mystery. An unanswered question that he longed to know about. If only he could find her again. See her again. But she had disappeared as quickly as she had come and he knew not one shred about her. He was helpless. He pulled the hair from his scalp angrily. She was a puzzle and he needed to solve her._


	2. Chapter 2

**So I was hoping for a few more reviews but maybe I will gather more as this fic gets longer. I hope you guys like it so far. I love Eli and Clare to death and it is rated M for a reason, I promise we just haven't gotten there yet.**

**Just so everyone knows: **

**Eli and Adam are 21**

**Clare is 17 turning 18 and Alli is 18 they are seniors just beginning their senior year. And I know the age difference between Eli and Clare seems like a lot but it's actually not and she would have been a freshman when he was a senior. **

"So be honest," Eli said holding his breath.

"It's really good but it's just a chapter, not even a whole chapter really, just almost a thought," Adam hesitated. The look on Eli's face was murderous. "I mean it's good but where are you going with this story?"

The question was fair enough and Eli paused. He didn't know why he felt almost guilty but he had been talking to Clare every day for a month now and every time they signed off line he had more to write about. Without their conversations however, he drew a blank. He so far had one chapter.

"It's about a girl. Celine and Ethan." Eli started. Adam smiled slightly and leaned forward on the counter of the bar, he took a swig of his beer and motioned for him to continue. "They're strangers to be honest, he doesn't know her and she doesn't know him, but she plagues his dreams and so he goes searching for her. Trying to find a way to discover who this mystery girl is. To find out who this girl is." Eli picked up a piece of the manuscript.

_Ethan paced the room running his hands through his hair. Yanking out strands and picking up the snow globe off his desk, throwing it across the room. He felt savagely happy when he heard it shatter into a million pieces, even though he knew he would have to clean them up later._

"He's literally going crazy. That's what this book is about. Him going crazy." Eli muttered and realized how close to home another one of his novels was hitting. Adam smiled too, chugging down his beer he said, "Who is she, Eli?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Eli said not making eye contact. Instead, he swirled his vodka on the rocks and took a sip.

"Alright, I won't push you on her, for now…" Adam teased. Eli's phone buzzed.

**Clare: Hey Eli :)**

Eli smiled at his phone screen and Adam shook his head, Eli however was too absorbed in his phone to notice anything else.

**Eli: Hey Clare :) What's up?**

Adam sighed, "I can tell when I've been replaced." The minute hand on the clock moved over two spaces. "EARTH TO ELI."

"What? Oh man sorry, I know you wanted this to be a guys night…"

**Clare: Had a really bad day at school today, can you talk on the phone, I feel so alone. :(**

"But?" Adam continued for his friend.

"But I'm needed elsewhere, I promise we'll do this again next weekend, I'm really sorry bro." Eli didn't even look up from his phone screen as he said this. Adam nodded his head understanding. When the girl you can't stop thinking about says jump you say how high. She had asked him to do something and he was going to do it, best friend or no best friend. Adam thought quietly of Fiona and sighed. He would miss her, but she was unattainable. Adam patted Eli's shoulder.

**Eli: Yes absolutely just give me five minutes and then we can talk all about it.**

"I'll see you buddy." Eli nodded at him and ran out of the bar, jogging back to his apartment. As soon as he was in the door he hit sent.

_Ring._

_Ring. _

_Ring._

"Hello?" Clare's soprano voice trilled.

"Hey Clare, talk to me." Eli practically begged. Just the sound of her voice on the other end of the line sent his heart thumping.

"Are you sure? I don't want to burden you," Clare asked, but her voice was hoping. Eli heard that and his heart swelled.

"Absolutely I'm all ears," Eli smiled, reassuring her.

"Well you know how Alli got accepted to MIT?" Clare asked, but she knew he would remember, Eli remembered everything Clare ever said to him. He never interrupted her and he seemed to hang on every word she said. It made her feel special for once in her life, although he was still a cryptic mystery.

"Yes I do," Eli told her.

"Well her and Dave had sex, I know what a shock and then she forgot to take her birth control pills. THIS IS THE GIRL WHO GOT ACCEPTED TO MIT FOR CHRIST'S SAKE AND SHE CAN'T REMEMBER TO TAKE A FLIPPING PILL!" Clare screamed into the phone. In that anger Eli heard her hurt and disappointment in her friend. "So now she thinks she's pregnant and with Dave's baby, but the worst part of it all is she is giving herself fake symptoms, she's worrying so much that she's making herself throw up and then claiming it is morning sickness? Like oh my God. How stupid can she be sometimes?" Clare vented angrily. Eli smiled even though Clare was upset. He was happy he was the one she was telling about these things. Not some other guy. Then for the first time however he felt worried.

Sex. She mentioned sex. Was she having sex? He knew she didn't have a boyfriend, she would have told him, but that didn't necessarily mean no sex did it? No. it didn't. The thought of Eli having sex with some nameless faceless guy was nauseating to Eli and it made his hands ball up in white hot anger. As he was trying to stop himself from going all Neanderthal he heard Clare's voice say, "And maybe I'm just a little jealous as well because she got into college so easily and I'm scared to death I won't get accepted anywhere."

"I promise Clare getting into college is a lot easier than it seems, you're a bright brilliant interesting girl, you'll go anywhere you want to, I promise." Eli stated easily. He for a moment envisioned Clare coming to school near him. He listened closely as she talked all night about her worries and fears, he reassured her with gentle words until she drifted off to sleep by the sound of his voice and it was only after she started snoring that he was able to hang up the phone and go to sleep himself.


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry I didn't update sooner, I was away in Virginia and there was no wifi I was so isolated. Here you goo.**

"Well I'm not pregnant Clare," Alli said. She let out a breath that demonstrated how relieved she was, but Clare didn't even look up. She was still looking at her phone.

**Eli: How was school today Cutie? **

Clare smiled happily. "HELLO CLARE! Your best friend is just coming out of a major crisis situation here and you're too busy looking at your phone?" Alli asked the question as though Clare had just ignored her cries to save her life.

**Clare: You know, academic! The usual :P How was your day? Productive as opposed to yesterday?**

She giggled slightly. She knew Eli had some kind of job or something like that, but he was always so cryptic about that. Everything else he told her whatever she wanted to know, just never what his job was. Clare lifted her head slowly, reluctantly.

"I'm really sorry Alli, I'm happy to hear you're not pregnant. I'm sure Dave will be too," Clare said. She felt her phone buzz in her pocket.

**Eli: Hey! I take that offensively, I'm always productive. **

"Alright enough of this, who is this hottie who has your panties in a twist?" Alli asked directly. Clare blushed and fidgeted.

"His name is Eli," Clare stipulated. She cast her eyes downward knowing that a whole flood of questions would follow the initial.

"How did you guys start talking? Does he go to school with us? How old is he?" Alli fired, her eyes wide with shock and excitement. "Do you have a picture?"

"One question at a time!" Clare teased but she was happy too, she hadn't told anyone about Eli, and yet he was the only subject she wanted to talk about. All day. Every day.

"WELL!" Alli shrieked girlishly. Clare scrolled through her phone looking for the picture he had sent her weeks ago when they had first started texting. It showed his upper body in a grey t-shirt, black leather jacket, chain necklace with half a heart on it, and of course his face. Black hair and piercing green eyes had made Clare's knees weak, but that was nothing compared to the picture she had received of him in the white tight tank top she had gotten a few nights ago. That picture however was just for her so she could admire his tight abs and muscular arms.

Alli took in the picture and widened her eyes again, "Woah Clare bear snagged a hottie! But he doesn't go to school with us does he?" Alli was sure she hadn't seen him lurking through the halls of Degrassi.

"No, he's 21 and lives in New York, he used to go to Degrassi though. He would have been a senior when we were freshmen. I think I remember him slightly. He remembered me."

"Wait, so you haven't met him in person since you started talking?" Alli began. Clare heard the uncertainty behind the question and became defensive.

"He knows all about things at Degrassi, he knows what to order at the dot and what not to order, he even had Mrs. Dawes as a teacher. He's not some weirdo fake. Trust me."

"Okay, okay I'm just making sure you remember what happened to Darcy?" Clare shuddered at the memory and glared at Alli for reminding her.

"I know, but it's not like that. And I might be able to go visit him in New York over Christmas." Clare said it. She had finally voiced her hopeful whim out loud and now she was waiting to hear Alli's opinion on her request from her family for the holidays.

"By yourself?" Alli asked and then she saw the look in Clare's eyes, the pure hope and almost desire.

"Well I would tell my mom and dad that I would be going to look at a college, and I would be visiting colleges while I'm there. There's a bunch of awesome city schools and it would be nice to be able to see them in person before I apply to them. Eli said he would show me around. And if I could get an internship or even a clerk job while at school with The New York Times, well that's every journalism students dream." Clare was ranting slightly and she knew it but she wanted to go to New York so badly it hurt.

"Well then I think as long as the first time you guys meet you do it in a public place then it shouldn't be a problem. I can see you as a chic New York college student already. Oh! And think you can go shopping there and go see Broadway and central park! Oh! I'm jealous. When you go to school there I'm visiting you!" Alli said enthusiastically. Clare beamed at her and hugged her tightly.

" Oh I'm so excited! I'll bring it up to Mom at dinner tonight and then call Dad about it tomorrow! I hope they say yes!" Clare crossed her fingers and Alli did the same.

**XXXXX**

"…And I would find a reasonably priced hotel room and it would only be for a week, and it would really give me some life experience, so can I please go? PLEASE?" Clare begged after explaining all the details to her mom and Glen. All the details, excluding Eli of course.

"Well," Clare's mother looked sideways at her new husband. "I don't see why not…"

"Oh let her go!" Glen said smiling at Clare she gave him a smile back.

"Okay, but you have to call your father. If he'll pay for the plane tickets I'll pay for everything else. That way I can get you a nicer hotel." Clare jumped out of her seat and already was dialing Randall. He too agreed after some begging. Clare was too excited to eat.

"May I pleased be excused from the dinner table?" She said quickly. Her mother nodded and she ran up the stairs holding down 3. Eli's number on speed dial.

"Hello?" His alto voice answered.

"ELI!" Clare squealed. He smiled at the other end of the phone line.

"No no zees iz nawt Eli. Yew ave da wrong number." He said using some fake accent from some far off country. Clare smiled knowing he was teasing her.

"Well I'm sorry sir, then I guess it's to whatever country your from I should go to over the upcoming break rather than New York to visit my friend Eli." She told him and then held her breath as what she said registered.

"You're coming?" His voice raised in excitement. It seemed almost too good to be true.

"YES! The 'rents said yes. So I'm coming for a week. December 16th through 24th!" Clare hesitated before asking the question that had been eating away at her for some time. "Are you okay with this? Do you want to see me?"

"Are you kidding!?" Eli was flabbergasted. "OF COURSE I WANT TO SEE YOU." In truth seeing her was all Eli ever thought about. It plagued his thoughts every day. The fact that she was coming was something out of a dream. The fact that he would be able to hug her, hold her, kiss her… _Woah. You don't get to kiss her. She is NOT your girlfriend._ But that didn't stop the thoughts about kissing her. And the dreams in which he did a lot more than kiss.

"Good. Cause I want to see you too," She smiled sure that it would be etched into her cheeks for the next month. "30 days Eli, and then I get to see you." The idea that she was going to be able to touch him sent her whole body tingling. "Oh Eli I can't wait!"

"What airport are you going to fly into?" Eli was already hatching a plan.

"I don't know yet but I promise you will hear all about the details as soon as we figure them out." She laid her head down on the pillow excitement coursing through her. "Eli, I'm finally going to be able to escape here," she sighed not really noticing what she was saying.

A wave of sadness coursed through him as he understood how desperately she wanted to be free of her prison like home. "You'll be here with me, and we can go look at tons of colleges, so you'll have your pick of where you want to go."

"I can't wait to see you." Clare murmured contently.

"Me either, Clare, me either."


	4. Chapter 4

**You guys should count yourself lucky, I never update my other stories this much. Trigger warning. **

Clare wore her happiness like a badge the next couple of days, and a bunch of people started to notice. Her ex boyfriend, KC was one of them.

"Hey Clare Bear," he said sidling up to her locker. He had grown nearly a foot over the summer and looked down at his ex girlfriend. She looked different. Probably because she wasn't wearing her loose grey sweatshirts and tight black leggings. Today she wore a dark blue high wasted skirt with a nice shirt and a cardigan, with tights and ballet flats.

**Eli: Video chat tonight?**

**Clare: Absolutely, I look pretty good today too.**

"Hey KC." Clare said looking up at him. He smiled down at her and caught a glimpse of her next text message.

**Eli: You know you're always beautiful. **

"You look good today," KC told her, his heart hammering slightly. Although he was with Jenna now, he didn't like the idea of Clare with some new guy.

"Thanks, Umm. Is there something you want?" Clare asked as she began to walk to her next class.

"No, not really I mean I know we haven't talked in a while, I heard your parents split up a couple months ago, I'm sorry to hear that." KC didn't really want to say any of those things, instead he wanted to ask about the guy Clare was texting with the big smile slashed across her face.

"Yeah, it sucked." Clare stated flatly.

"Who are you texting?" KC blurted out. Clare squinted her eyes at him and flipped her phone quickly shut.

"He's a friend."

"How good of a friend?" KC inquired further.

"He's just some guy I know. Why do you care anyway?" Clare asked keeping her eyes cast downward.

"You know me, I just wanna make sure you're okay. I don't want anyone taking advantage of you." KC said, reaching to brush a lock of her hair behind her ear, Clare pulled away from his touch.

"Like you did?" She asked quietly. His whole body changed and his hand dropped to his side.

"Shut up. Who is this kid anyway. There isn't an Eli at our school. So who is he some pervert creep you met online?" KC asked acidly. Clare pursed her lips and wrapped her arms tight around herself, willing herself not to break apart at the seams in front of her ex. If only she could get to the bathroom, but she couldn't just run away.

"That's none of your damn business. You need to get over yourself KC." Clare bit back. KC didn't even hear her though he just barked out a bitter laugh.

"He is. Shocking. That's the only way you can get a guy, if they don't see you first."

"KC, go away."

"Gladly." He retorted, turning on his heel. She ran for the bathroom at record speed and then locked herself in a stall. She tried to take steady breaths but the tears rushed over the sides of her eyes and she begged herself to stop. But they wouldn't. She would seem like a fool if she walked into class with puffy red eyes, so she put her phone in her pocket and pushed back the sleeves of her cardigan. Digging her fingernail into an unmarked area of skin she felt he release that came with crying, but without the knowing stares. She let out a sigh of relief even though her blood was pumping out of the freshly made wound.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Eli typed impatiently away at his computer. He was writing some filler chapter in his story, but he wasn't paying close enough attention. He knew from the way he constantly checked the skype browser waiting for Clare to log on that he would have to rewrite the entire thing later.

Clare. Oh how she haunted them. Since that September day when they had begun talking they hadn't stopped. They had become fast friends and now in the middle of the November, she was coming down to see him. He couldn't believe his luck. With Clare he felt something he hadn't felt in so long.

Attraction. He wanted to be more than her friend, and although he knew how hard that would be he was willing to do it. She was turning his life around in a way he hadn't thought would be possible since the whole Julia incident. Every day he had more and more words towards the new book that he was writing just for her, although she didn't know it yet.

_Bleep._

_Bleep._

_Bleep._

Eli accepted the call instantly and felt his heart flutter in his chest when he saw the pretty blue eyed girl looking at him through her webcam.

"Hey there," he said smiling brightly, but then he observed her face and realized how sad she seemed. "What's wrong?"

"My ex." She said, keeping her head down. She was rubbing anxiously at her wrist and she felt guilty for some reason. Like she should have told Eli what she did, but he wasn't ready for that bomb, just yet.

"What did that fucker do?" Eli asked through gritted teeth. His fists were clenched. He could feel the anger running through his body and he hoped he could control it.

"He started hitting on me and then basically got all jealous when he saw I was texting you and then he said the only reason we were even talking is because you didn't have to see me." Clare whispered the last part, almost hoping he wouldn't hear it. Eli squinted at her.

"What else happened?" He pressed kindly.

"Nothing." Clare said flatly. Eli knew there was something else though.

"What else Clare, why won't you tell me?"

"It's just nothing Eli! Just drop it okay!?" She spat. He hesitated.

"Clare nothing that asshole said to you was true. You are always beautiful, regardless of what you are wearing that day. The reason we talk is because we're friends, we have a lot of common interests and we used to be in the same school. And I wish I was lucky enough to see you, every day if I could. I hate that we have to wait until Christmas to meet in person." He told her. This made Clare feel even worst though, because she was lying she began to cry. Eli looked horrified. "What is it? What did I say? I'm sorry!"

"No it's not you," She sniffed. She began to slowly roll up the sleeves of the cardigan revealing the old scars and then the new angry red mark from today. "The red one is from today, because of what he said." Clare admitted.

Eli breathed deeply, but inside he was in turmoil. He didn't realize how close he was coming to losing her. If she was resorting to cutting, that means she could have thought about suicide. Eli's heart stopped at that thought. No. He wouldn't allow that to happen. He would protect her from anything. Even herself.

And then there was the ex boyfriend issue. So he still noticed her. Still paid attention to her, still even probably harbored some desire for her, but he didn't know how much and what for. Did he long to sleep with her again? Had he ever slept with her at all, the need to know was eating Eli up alive and he had to bit his tongue to keep from pestering her about it. When it was important for him to know, he would. Right now his guy brain had to shut off and his friend brain had to go into overdrive.

"Clare, just lean back and close your eyes okay? Don't cry. Close your eyes and listen to the sound of my voice." Eli commanded. Initially Clare looked confused, but she did as he asked.

"Imagine you're lying in a loft in new York city. You're in the comfiest clothes you own. That big red hoodie of yours and those black sofie shorts, and those green fuzzy socks. The room is the perfect temperature and it's a clean starry night. Now imagine that I'mmmmm I mean someone you love is lying next to you just rubbing your back, and slowly you're becoming sleepy. This person loves you and you just shared the most wonderful day together, after a picnic in central park and seeing Chicago on Broadway…" Eli kept on going, painting this scenario for the sad girl, and he saw her breathing even out and her muscles relax. Little did he know, the person whom she was thinking of was the same person telling her the story.


	5. Chapter 5

**This is probably my most active fanfiction, you guys should feel lucky that I update this much. Maybe if I had more reviews you guys would get more and some eclare meeting sooner.**

Eli was at the bar with Adam and he was feeling slightly buzzed. He asked the bartender for a water.

"So talk to me." Adam said. His best friend had been in writing mode for weeks now, and thanksgiving was fast approaching. Adam was spending it with Eli and Eli's parents, instead of going home to his brother and mother.

"Well I'm almost done with the book." He said quietly. Adam fist bumped him.

"Booyah!" Adam shouted happily. Eli looked at him, shook his head, and laughed. He looked down at his phone obsessively, but there was still no text message.

"Dude," Eli said. "I'm going crazy."

"The girl?" Adam asked.

"Yes." Eli groaned.

"Who is she man, you gotta tell me now." Adam demanded. Eli knocked back the rest of his liquor.

"She's 17 and she goes to our old school, Degrassi." Eli decided it was best to get the worst out of the way.

"Say what?" Adam asked confused.

"Well, see, I went on my old screen name a couple weeks ago, desperate for some inspiration and she was the only one on. I was dying here so I finally imed her. And basically we haven't stopped. I thought, you know one night that was all I needed but then I found myself wanting to always talk to her, eventually we started texting and talking and now we skype all the time. I can't believe it. I'm so cliché idiot who fell for a girl too young for me too far away." Eli admitted. He was happy to say it out loud and now he was waiting to hear what Adam had to say. He held his breath expectantly.

"Lemme get this straight," Adam began. "You haven't even thought about a girl for three years, and then you find one. One four years too young and eight hours too far. In a city where there is a million people, you pick the one four years younger and eight hours away." And then he was laughing. Laughing so hard he had beer coming out of his nose and he fell off his barstool. And even through all that he was still laughing. "She better be really good in bed." Adam was teasing of course.

"She's turning eighteen soon, so she's really only three years younger." Eli hesitated. "She was a niner when we were seniors."

"What's so special about her?" Adam asked, not teasingly, but seriously. He wanted to know why this girl had caught Eli's attention.

"She's so different Adam. She's not melodramatic and she's real and non judgmental. She's got so much going on at home she's having a really hard time. I care about her so much though and She's helped kill the writer's block. She's coming to visit over her Christmas break. She's staying at my place." Eli was beaming when he told him this and Adam couldn't help but smile also.

"Eli you're going to need to get the swat team in their to clean before she comes, that place is a war zone." Adam teased again. Eli swatted him playfully.

"I…" Eli broke off his sentence as his phone buzzed.

**Clare: Hey there :) **

**Eli: Hey you **

"That's her isn't it?" Adam asked knowingly.

"Yes, she's pretty much the only one I talk to anymore." Eli hesitated. "Besides you of course."

"You love her." Adam said quietly, but his best friend did not hear, he was too busy sending a text to the girl who consumed his thoughts.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Clare?" Jake said sitting down next to her. She smiled at him and offered him some of her popcorn.

"How you been Jake?" Clare asked casually. She had been enjoying her movie but was happy to have company, even though she wished he was Eli.

"Good, I wanted to talk about something," he told her seriously. Clare paused her movie and looked up.

"What's up?" She queried, letting the 'p' pop.

"You know Katie Malin right?" Jake asked quietly.

"Duh, we work together on news paper, why something wrong between you two?"

"You know about us?" He responded, surprised.

"You guys suck face in the hall every day before my math class. Of course I know about you two guys. But it's all good."

"You're not mad?" Jakes hoped.

"No, I'm happy you're happy." Clare told him. And she was. Her phone buzzed in her palm.

**Eli: Skype?**

Clare smiled radiantly.

**Clare: Yes.**

"Jake I like you a lot, and I like Katie just as much, you guys are good, she's a cool girl. She helped me land my co op with Asher." Clare handed him the popcorn and the remote and headed upstairs.

_Bing._

_Bing._

_Bing._

"Hey there," Eli cooed to her over the screen. Clare fluttered her eyelashes.

"Hey, you couldn't have picked a more perfect time to call," She told him happily.

"Why is that?" He wondered aloud.

"Just had the most awkward conversation with Jake about his new girlfriend Katie." Clare said laughingly.

"Why was that awkward? Were you guys talking about sex?" Eli spit out before he could stop himself. He was a guy. He always thought about sex.

"Oh God no. It's just awkward because he doesn't want it to be awkward for me if he brings his new girlfriend home but his old girlfriend is still here," she explained. Eli started choking.

"What do you mean his old girlfriend?" Eli asked.

"Jake and I used to date, I could've sworn I told you that," Clare admitted. She didn't fully understand his reaction.

"You most certainly did not."

Eli's mind was doing over time now. He was thinking, TWO exboyfriends, that's practically a whole nation. Did they have sex? Did they do stuff? Did they STILL do stuff? Eli couldn't wrap his mind around it. He had to know, but it wasn't his business to know.

"HAVEYOUEVERHADSEX?" He asked before he could stop himself.

Clare sat there and looked at him.


	6. Chapter 6

**Wow. I am so good, updating on a day when I had cheerleading and school. You guys should know how much I love you.**

Clare looked at her screen, shocked by what Eli had just said. She couldn't believe he actually had the nerve to ask her this. But then again, she didn't blame him. She had been wondering the same thing about him for weeks.

"No," She said calmly. She saw his face relax. She smiled sadly. "I was going to with Jake, but we broke up, and I'm glad I didn't lose it to him. I used to tell myself I was waiting until marriage." She hesitated and then showed him her ring. "It says _true love waits_, and then I realized, it doesn't matter who you're married to. You don't always love the one you end up saying the vows to. So instead I decided I'm going to wait until I'm truly in love with a person. No matter when that is." Eli looked pleasantly surprised, then paled slightly when she asked, "have you?"

Eli felt a wave of emotions pass through him. The first one would have to be relief. The second one was possession. In a weird way he wanted to be her first, not just hr first, but her only as well. He wanted to awaken her body to the kinds of things… WOAH. Hold it. Then there was worry. What if it screwed up his chanced with her because of Julia. But he couldn't lie to her. He had to tell her the truth.

"I had a girlfriend, Julia. We were together from freshman year till the middle of senior year. She had a really hard home life so she used to stay over a lot. I was a teenage boy back then," he paused and smirked. She smiled at him and nodded understandingly.

"Was she the only one?" Clare queried.

"Yes," Eli admitted. Her eyebrows raised in surprise, but not discontent. She was happy. She wasn't disappointed. She was also shocked. He could tell, "surprised?" She blushed.

"Well, I just assumed someone as well, you know, who looks like, well you, would have had, a lot of … well you know… with a lot of…girls." Clare blabbed. She bit her tongue embarrassed by what she had just said, but Eli's insides danced in happiness.

"Someone who looks like what Edwards?" Eli feigned idiocy. She rushed on.

"Oh come on!" She pleaded. "You know you're hot!"

"Me? Hot?"

"With all that black hair, and green eyes. Not to mention perfectly sculpted arms and abs that look so good I could lick… them." She squeaked. Her cheeks flooded with crimson and she quickly averted her eyes to the floor.

"Well, well, well now the secrets come out. Has Clare Edwards been fantasizing about me?" Eli questioned. His insides were dancing the cucaracha in celebration. He was so happy just to think that maybe for a second Clare had been thinking about him the same way he had been dreaming about her.

_They were in his room._ _The lights were low as he looked into her eyes._

"_I'm so happy you're here," he told her honestly. She nodded snuggling deeper into his bare chest. She pressed her lips into his neck._

"_Me too," she responded happily. Then she climbed on top of him._

"_Mmmm, Baby," he murmured to her. She smiled, lifting her shoot over her head, revealing the black lacy bra underneath, he quickly disposed of the bra and latched his mouth onto one nipple while his hand teased the other into a small round nub. She moaned arching her head back in pleasure._

"_Please Eli, please," she begged. Her eyes were half dazed as he flipped her over, removing her pants in one sharp tug, she watched coyly as he did the same. _

_He reached his finger down to rub that spot and she went wild, begging and pulling tight at his hair. She bit her lip so hard a small drop of blood was forming there. He was about to push into her, about to feel her warmth sheath him._

_BEEP_

_BEEP_

_BEEP_

And then the alarm woke him up, with no moaning Clare and a raging hard on.

"Eli?" Clare called. He shook his head.

"I'm sorry Clare, I didn't mean for the conversation to take this turn. We can talk about something else if you want." He offered. He had to be her knight in shining armor. Not the guy who took her virginity and left her crying.

"Thanks, you want to play the awkward question game though?" Clare asked spontaneously. There were things she was just dying to know though.

"Sure," Eli agreed, "You first."

"Okay, how many girlfriends have you had?" Clare pondered, hopping right to the point.

"1. How many boyfriends have you had?" Eli asked back

"3. KC, Fitz, and Jake."

"Did you love all of them?"

"I thought I loved KC, but that was just infatuation. I never loved Fitz, I don't think I really even liked Fitz to be honest, and I love Jake," she paused thoughtful for a minute. Noticing the tension in Eli's eyes she continued, "but as brother now. He really is an awesome big brother, I think you would really like him."

I'd like any guy who isn't hurting you or trying to have sex with you, Eli thought.

"Do you have any siblings?" Clare asked him.

"Nope, I'm an only child, but I have my best friend Adam, who has always been more like a brother than anything else. Do you have any siblings besides Jake?"

"Darcy, but she's in Africa." Clare said. "What do you do for a living?"

Eli hesitated. He trusted Clare, but he worried if he told her, all she would see is E.J. Gold and not Eli Goldsworthy, the guy she had gotten to know. "I write," he responded vaguely, and Clare knew by his tone of voice that it was best to drop that question. "What's your biggest fear?"

"Not being good enough," Clare admitted. His hear warmed and he wished to hug her to him.

"You are more than good enough, no matter what." He reassured her. She smiled at him.

"Do you like anyone?" Clare asked.

"I like a lot of people," he deliberated.

"I meant _like like_," She teased, sounding like a true teenager.

"Maybe," He smirked. "Do you?"

"Maybe," She responded back.

He had met his match, a girl just as witty and just as clever as he was. And he couldn't be more thrilled about it.


	7. Chapter 7

**Okay guys, not to be a greedy bitch but I would have liked a FEW more reviews. Seems like people are losing enthusiasm for the story the longer I go? Should I just cut the story short here.**

Clare sat on the plane tapping her foot anxiously. She couldn't wait to take off. She couldn't wait to get there. She couldn't believe she was going. That she was sitting on the plane waiting to take off so that she could meet Eli.

**Blue eyes :) Have a safe flight I'll be at the airport waiting for you! **

Clare smiled at her cell phone.

**But how will you know it's me?** She responded.

**It's obvious isn't it? You'll be the most beautiful girl in the airport.**

Eli was being charming, but he couldn't help it. He was nervous and wanted to see her badly. He didn't know how he was going to wait out the four hour flight from Toronto to New York. Without talking to her. That would be torture.

**I have to go, I'll talk to you when I land! **

Clare had been tempted to write love you after the exclamation point but decided not to. They weren't there. They were just friends. That was all.

**Be safe. Don't meet any guys on the plane.**

He teased, but in there was his slight insecurity. That she would find someone and then he would be left all alone, reeling from those feelings he couldn't dare say out loud. Although Adam had already figured them out from his strange behavior. Dinner with his family had been awkward enough without him pining for Clare and her being desolate over the first thanksgiving without her dad.

XXXXXXXXX

"Eli!" Audra exclaimed wrapping her arms around Eli like he was her third son. He hugged her back happy to lose himself for a few moments in a motherly embrace. He was then released and went to hug Drew and his girlfriend Bianca. They smiled at him. He tried to return the sentiment.

**Worst. Thing. Ever. I'm so miserable. It's me, my mom, Jake, and Glen. This is horrible.**

Eli sighed wishing he could take her away from it all, but as he sat down at the dinner table he knew he couldn't do anything to rescue her.

**Just focus on all the yummy delicious food around you.**

"Eli, phones away please," Audra requested. Eli did what was asked, but his heart ached as he did so.

"Clare will be okay Dude," Adam appeased him as he dug into the mountain of mashed potatoes that sat on his plate.

"Oh Eli! Who's Clare?" Bianca asked she too going to work on her food.

"This girl," Eli said avoiding answering further by shoving stuffing into his mouth.

"Oh you know, just this 17 year old from Toronto who is visiting Eli over break. Did I forget to mention he loves her?" Adam sarcastically clarified. This got a punch from Eli across the table, but Adam didn't regret saying what he did. He wasn't sorry he said it. Eli was just too afraid to admit it.

"Adam!" Eli yelled.

"Seventeen?" Drew repeated incredulously.

"Shut it Drew. She was a niner when we were seniors." Eli said trying to make the age difference sound not as vast.

"She goes to Degrassi?" Bianca queried.

"Yeah. I met her on an old Degrassi chat site. That's how we started talking."

"And what you just never stopped?" Drew questioned. Eli bowed his head and when he raised it he saw Audra smiling.

"Audra?" Eli whispered across the table. Her eyes twinkled.

"She must be very special," she started. He blushed looking down.

"She is."

"Don't lose her." Audra warned and in that Eli saw what she meant, not that he would mess it up, but that he wouldn't put his pride and fear aside to seize his chance. He would heed her instructions. "Keep her."

"Always." He agreed.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Clare was twitching and this did not pass the guy who was sitting next to her's notice.

"Is everything alright?" The man asked slightly worried about the twitchy girl looking out the window.

"Yes, Yes I just can't wait to get there." She told him. She looked at him closely and noticed how cute he was. He had shaggy brown hair and grey eyes and small chin. "I'm Clare."

"Declan," he said holding out his hand. "Have you ever been to New York before?"

"No. I've imagined going there though. And now I'm meeting this person there and I just, I can't wait." She realized she was babbling. "Have you?"

"I live there," He looked closer at the cute blonde. "How old are you?"

"Seventeen, almost eighteen. How bout yourself?"

"Twenty." He smiled down at her. "New York is a cool place and the guy you're meeting must be pretty cool if you're flying down on your winter break just to see him."

"How did you know it was a guy?" She asked her jaw dropped, flabbergasted.

"You're a pretty young girl. I have a sister. The only friend they would be meeting is someone they really want to see. And I don't care how close you and your girlfriends are, it's a guy you want to see. Unless I assumed wrong and you're actually a lesbian, but either way the principle is the same. You're going to meet someone you have a potential romantic relationship with." Clare blushed.

"His name is Eli." She admitted. He smiled at her.

"I'm sure this Eli won't disappoint you. And if he does you can always come and visit me,' he offered. She smiled at him and accepted his phone number and address. He was very cute, but her heart did not flutter when he looked at her. Just a text from Eli sent her head spinning. She was so excited she could barely breathe in anticipation. Soon she would be in his arms, soon he would take away the problems of the world and soon she might even be able to call him hers. But that last one was only based on luck, and Clare didn't really like luck. Things hadn't always worked well for her when she counted on that.


	8. Chapter 8

**Ahh all the reviews. Just to clarify, that was a flashback in the last chapter sorry for the confusion. Thank you all for your support. **

The hours that Clare was on the plane were torturous for Eli. He thought about all the statistics on plane crashes and even though the chances seemed rare it still could happen. The worst always did seem to happen to him. He checked his watch again. He still had four hours to kill and decided to write some more.

However, writing wasn't going as easily as he hoped. He was blocked and knew now that he would not be able to get work done until she got here so instead he decided to call up Adam.

Who being the asshole that he was decided not to answer.

He couldn't go for a walk but he needed to take his mind off of Clare before he lost control of his fears and his desires. He wasn't sure which one was worse. His phone rang clearing his thoughts.

"Thanks for answering the phone douche bag," Eli said into the mouth piece.

"Nice to hear from you too Elijah," the female voice trilled. Eli laughed for a second realizing it wasn't Adam on the phone.

"I'm sorry, I thought you were Adam," he told her.

"I figured as much. He told me to call you because Adam is on some date and he knew that you would be freaking out," the girl explained.

"He's a good friend."

"Better than you Eli! How could you not tell me that some teenager was coming to stay with you over break!" She yelled. "I thought we were friends, I came out to you for goodness sake's and I don't even get a text message. Nothing. Silence from Mr. Big Shot EJ Gold."

"I'm sorry, Fi!" He apologized. And he truly was sorry, he hadn't meant not to tell her, but in all honesty he didn't know what to say.

"So spill," she ordered. And he did. He told her all about Clare. About her parents and how he talked to her all the time, how they had eventually planned this upcoming week, how he wanted to see her more than anything. He told her how he felt, something he hadn't felt since Julia. He told her that he was writing again, that she cured his writers block to an extent. He told her he was afraid.

"… and just what if she doesn't like me? What if it just can't work?" He asked, more to himself than to her.

"It will work, you deserve this E, if anyone does you do… or Adam," she added quickly forcing him to crack a smile. "Things will work out, they will, and I expect you to bring her to a Coyne gathering so we can all judge the crap out of her, and so we can meet this new girl of Adam's too."

"I don't know Fiona, she's only seventeen."

"She'll be fine we're not going to get her _that _ drunk." She teased and he smiled knowing Fiona didn't drink anyway. He laughed.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you, I promise if there are any new developments you will be the first to hear."

"Good. I better be, cause you owe me big for keeping you distracted." She scolded lightly. He chuckled again.

"How's Imo doing?"

"Not well, she's really upset about her Dad, we've been working on it. She'll get better soon, I know she will. But the wedding planning has been temporarily put on hold because of him being moved to an assisted living facility." She sighed.

"I'm sorry, I still get to be the man of honor don't i?" He queried trying to lighten the mood. She laughed.

"As long as you keep us updated!" She deliberated. He laughed and looked at his watch.

"I've got to head out, you know how traffic is at this hour."

"TELL ME EVERYTHING WHEN YOU SEE HER! I WANT TO RECEIVE CREEPY STALKER PICTURES OF HER!" Fiona begged.

"Alright, alright, I'll see you soon, thanks for everything."

"Anytime," she assured and hung up the phone with a decisive click.

The drive to the airport didn't take long enough and he was stuck waiting for her to come out of that gate. Those last fifteen minutes seemed to tick by and it was actually painful to sit there and wait. But then he saw her.

Dressed in a denim skirt with black leggings and a striped shirt she was easily the most beautiful person in the whole airport. She was speaking, and looked slightly harried. She was also talking to some guy, Eli thought he looked familiar, but he couldn't pinpoint where. He was just so happy to see her that he almost didn't feel jealous when he saw his hand rest on her shoulder. Almost. She moved closer but still didn't see him, however her voice came into earshot.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Declan and Clare had talked all the way home, mostly about nonsense, but here or there something of actual importance came up. He was nice to her, handsome too and they walked off the plane together and stayed side by side as they went to get their checked bags.

"Is Eli picking you up?" Declan asked her. She smiled and her heart started to race.

"Yeah he said he was, oh but what if he doesn't come? What if he forgot? What if there was traffic and he was late but then his phone died so he couldn't text me and now he's not going to show up for another two hours and I'll have no way of knowing…" Clare babbled on and on about all the circumstances that could have happened in the time it took her to fly to New York. Declan placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"Then we'll split a car okay?" He told her after she suggested that maybe Eli had gotten beat up by a gang on his way here.

"But what if he comes then because he was simply late and he sees I'm not here!" She practically shrieked.

"I'm not late," the lusty voice of a male tenor said. And Clare's heart stopped. "Turn around Blue eyes, I've been waiting to see you for months now."

**Review?**


	9. Chapter 9

**I know I'm the worst, but it's been a bad couple of weeks. Review to make me feel better.**

Clare stood there her feet frozen in place, her heart hammering in her chest and then she twirled around and looked at him. He was as beautiful as his pictures had shown. His jet black hair fell in front of his emerald eyes and she couldn't move for she was sure she was about to faint. Declan put a comforting hand on her shoulder and then gave her a little push.

Eli stood there watching her just as deeply as she watched him. She was absolutely beautiful, her blue eyes sparkling, a blush spreading on her cheeks. He could tell she was nervous and he didn't want to scare her and although he longed to hold her in his arms, he did not move. Waiting for her to come to him.

And then she did.

Running at full speed she sprinted across the airport, dropping her bags to jump into his arms. And the best part was, he caught her easily.

"Eli," She cooed at him. Eli's heart beat sped up.

"Clare," and the urge to kiss her overwhelmed him, yet he held himself back. He didn't want to rush into this. He set her gently back on the ground and she smiled.

"You came!" She exclaimed happiness seeping out of every inch of hers. She waved at Declan who flashed her a smile and the call me sign and she walked off, Eli carrying her bags for her.

"Of course I did. How was the trip?" He asked. He wanted to hold her hand, but she was already whipping out her cell phone. He guided her slowly back to the car.

"It was long, but worth it, how was the drive here?" She queried back. She was tingling with excitement looking all around the city she didn't even realize how hungry she was until she heard her stomach growl.

"Hungry?" He teased and she nodded, chewing softly on her lower lip. It was so deeply sensual Eli had to look away to make sure he didn't crash the car.

"A little," She admitted and he laughed.

"I'm cooking dinner tonight. I hope you don't mind. I know you can't wait to eat New York bagels and pizza and Chinese food, but I have a really special meal picked out for tonight." He told her blabbering on a little now feeling very foolish because he hadn't really given her a choice, but she just smiled at him.

"I didn't know you could cook." She said instead, because the idea of him cooking for her made her happier than she cared to realize.

"Yeah, I know single guy lives alone in New York city, but I'm also budget conscious," he said a then bit the inside of his cheek. He hated lying to her.

"What are you going to make?" She asked, now curious to know what this big meal he had planned for her was.

"You'll see. I want it to be a surprise." And he pulled the car into his parking garage. He saw Clare's face as she took in his apartment. She pulled out a phone as her ringtone played.

"Hello?" She answered and heI heard her mother's shrill tone on the opposite end of the phone.

"Why didn't you call me the minute you landed. Clare Edwards I swear if you are getting into some kind of trouble I will come down there and bring you back home myself. We had a deal and you're already going back on it. I should have never let you come." Eli watched as Clare's whole body shifted. Her hand automatically enclosing itself around her wrist to squeeze what he knew was a stinging cut. Her body language relaxed as she squeezed her wrist harder and she tried to calm her mother down. He opened the door to his apartment and couldn't help but smirk as she took it in.

It was nicely furnished. Not the crappy couches and tv's she expected. There was a dark sectional staring at a decent sized flat screen tv with a nice wooden coffee table. He brought Clare to her room and she was surprised to see the walls a calming shade of tea green and white whicker furniture. The sheets had already been placed on her bed. She looked around the room but there were no personal photos anywhere. She explored the rest of the apartment stunned by the top notch appliances and cleanliness of the place. She had expected a manly bachelor pad and yet somehow this beautiful place was not disappointing at all. The smell of garlic interrupted her thoughts.

"Everything alright?" He asked as she came over and stood next to him as he stirred the sauce on the counter.

"Everything is wonderful, this place is nothing like I pictured it and somehow it fits you all the same." She told him and he smiled. He put the spoon in the sauce and picked up a little bit o it for her.

"Wanna try some?" He offered and she nodded enthusiastically. He blew It off in order to cool it down and then she nibbled the bit off the edge of the spoon and she moaned a little but, causing the blood to run a little farther south.

"It's delicious. I can't wait to eat the rest of it." she said. He smiled and peacefully went back to cooking. He couldn't believe that she was actually there. In his house, looking around at all his things. It felt almost too good to be true, but there she was. More beautiful than a computer could have hoped to capture. He wanted to impress her, to woo her, to show her that no matter how much her mother may yell there was someone right here who… well cared about her. The L word was just too scary to even think right now.

"What are you doing?" He demanded when she started going through his drawers and cabinets.

"Looking for silverware, I want to set the table." She responded, continuing her search. He rolled his eyes.

"Clare, you're the guest…" He began, but she cut him off.

"You are cooking me dinner, I set the table and clean up, that's the way it works and then it's equal division of labor." She waited a moment. "Deal?" She said sticking out her hand.

"Deal." He replied grabbing her hand and shaking it. As her skin touched his he couldn't help but feel the sparks that tingled up his arm. The same time he felt them, Clare's eyes betrayed her surprise. Because she felt them too. She just would never admit it.


	10. Chapter 10

**I know I know I'm the worst, but my home was affected by hurricane Sandy so cut me some slack. Hope you guys like it.**

They had eaten dinner. Well, he had eaten his dinner. She had humored him with a few bites and then chewed it up in her mouth but spit it out in her napkin when she thought he wasn't looking. The major problem was, he was always looking. He knew about her problems with food. It had come up in one of their video chats.

_Flashback._

"Clare what's wrong?" He asked her over the video screen as she continued to cry.

"Why do you even talk to me?" She sobbed. Eli's heart hurt, he couldn't imagine not talking to her. He wanted to go to her, to hold her in his arms and tell her everything was alright.

"Why wouldn't I?" He queried back to her.

"Because I'm an anorexic depressed cutter and that's all I'll ever be. Why do you even bother?" He had spend the rest of the night consoling her, never telling her how much it hurt him that she did these things to herself. He was determined to help her.

XXXX

"How'd you like dinner?" He asked while he cleared the table. She smile at him.

"It was delicious." She lied. It's not that the food hadn't tasted good, it was just that all food repulsed her. Even if her stomach lied to her.

"I'm glad you liked it." He mused lightly as he loaded the dishwasher. She sat on the counter smiling at him and he was overwhelmed by the image of her like this. He wanted to slide between her legs and kiss her endlessly, but instead he continued with the dishes.

"You want to watch TV?" He offered and she nodded following him to his living room. They sat on the sofa and began to watch. Slowly inching closer and closer as the program wore on but they never actually touched. Suddenly his phone beeped.

"FUCK!" He exclaimed looking at the caller ID.

"Hello to you too Elijah," Fiona's voice slurred on the cell phone. "Before you get your panties all in a twist come to your door." Eli rolled his eyes and opened the door, unsurprised to see Fiona, Imogen, and Adam standing there.

"Hey guys, come in I guess." He said reluctantly. He sat down next to Clare this time and they all ogled her. She felt extremely awkward.

"Uhm Hi?" She said softly.

"I'm so sorry about this Blue eyes, but my friends just decided to invite themselves over and I couldn't say no." She nodded and when he smirked at her, her heart warmed. Fiona ran over to Clare and wrapped her in an arm crushing embrace!

"Oh Clare! It's so nice to meet you!" She squealed. Then Imogen bounced over and did the same.

"That's Fiona and Imogen," Eli said by way of explanation. "They're just here because I have the best tv."

"Elijah! That is so not true and you know it. If you hadn't hid Clare away from us we would have given you this time with her, but now we have to make up for lost time." Fiona argued crossing her arms in front of her chest.

"I'm Adam," the boy said. Clare smiled at him and shook his hand.

"Nice to meet you. All of you." She was genuinely happy to know that Eli had talked to his friends about her. That he wasn't ashamed by her as KC had been.

"Nice to meet you too. And please just ignore those two, we don't even really like them." Adam joked causing Clare to chuckle and Eli to feel a pang of jealousy. He gave Adam a glare that neither him nor Clare missed. Clare felt a little happy to know that Eli was jealous.

"So how about we all play the awkward question game to get to know each other a bit better?" Imogen offered. They all shrugged her off, but in the end decided they would play. Eli sat close to Clare and Imogen and Fiona interlocked arms.

"So hmmm, group raise your hand if you're a virgin?" Eli cringed as Fiona asked the question. Eli already knew about everyone else in the room, but he could tell Fiona was sending Clare through the gauntlet in her way of trying to see if she was good enough for him.

Clare was the only one to raise her hand. She blushed bright red and Eli rubbed her arm encouragingly. She smiled at him.

"Really? I thought someone as pretty as you would have definitely had a serious boyfriend." Imogen said sweetly. Clare smiled at her and held up her hand with the ring on it.

"True love waits, and I haven't felt true love yet, so I'm still waiting." She said as an explanation and they all nodded in understanding.

"Okay, Clare your turn to ask the question." Adam prompted.

"Uh Okay. Raise your hand if you are in a relationship or interested in someone." She offered. Imogen and Fiona held hands and raised them. Adam raised a hand as did Eli and Clare.

"Imogen and Fiona are dating each other." Eli told Clare.

"How long have you two been going out?" She asked. This was girl talk and Eli knew where this was headed.

"Since we were both seniors in highschool. Although Fi is a year older than me." Imogen gushed. Fiona gave her a peck on the cheek.

"That's so cute!" Clare squealed. Eli and Adam looked at each other and rolled their eyes.

"Girls, can we please get back to the game?" Adam asked. Imogen slapped him playfully but they did continue.

They played into the night, but Clare was jetlagged and eventually fell asleep on Eli's lap but the rest of them stayed up talking.

"She's wonderful Eli," Imogen said indicating her approval.

"Of course she is, would I pick someone who was anything less?" He teased. Imogen blushed knowing about the compliment that was towards her as well. Back to that brief time when they had dated.

"I just want you to be careful," Fiona added seriously. He nodded, looking down at the sleeping girl in his lap. Her lips slightly open, her eyes closed, her breathing easy.

"I will be." He promised.


	11. Chapter 11

**I'm updating again. Wippee.**

She was screaming and Eli was racing to get to her.

"Clare! Open the door!" Eli banged on the door and shook her violently awake. She opened her eyes.

"I'm sorry." She told him.

"Why were you screaming?" He asked sounding pained. Clare swallowed.

"Nightmares, I'm sorry Eli, I didn't mean to wake you up." She apologized. He was still holding her in his arms as he sat down on the bed next to her.

"Don't apologize. I was just worried about you." He confessed. He moved closer to her and she snuggled into his warmth happy to be with him, near him, touching him.

"It's okay, it happens almost every night." She admitted feeling ashamed. She was weak and now he was seeing it firsthand.

"I'm sorry beautiful." He said sadly and she nodded.

"You can go back to sleep now," she told him. She didn't want to keep him up. He snuggled in closer to her.

"I am," and he laid his head down on her pillow. She shivered for a minute, but did not protest, because she wanted him near her always. She laid her head down on his chest and listened to his heart beat as it soothed her back to sleep. She drifted off easily but he remained awake. He reached for her hand and looked at the scars mixed with cuts on the inside of her wrist. The newest one looked just a day old. He pressed her wrist softly to his lips so that he could kiss her cuts away. He wished to take away her pain. He too eventually slept, although it was fitful and filled with nightmares. All in which, he lost her.

"So blue eyes, what do you want to do today?" He asked her. She smiled at this sentence. It was the one that had greeted her every morning since they had slept in the same bed together and each day he had surprised her with a new adventure.

_Monday_

"So blue eyes, what do you want to do today?" He asked her that morning. She had worried about all the things girls worry about in the mornings. Her bed head, her morning breath, her sweat, but he had noticed none of these things. They were off as soon as she and he both showered.

"So why are you bringing me here?" She asked as they stepped through the doors of the bagel store.

"Because, you can't come to New York City and not eat a bagel!" He declared. Ordering for her a scooped toasted plain bagel with barely any butter. He had handed it to her and watched her as she pretended to take a bite. He knew that she had planned on using this vacation to drop as many calories as possible, but he simply would not allow it. "Please Clare, eat it. Please." He had whispered to her slightly, his green eyes warming her soul.

She took a bite and her body fought her on it. Refusing to swallow it, she tried with all her might to push the greasy blob of calories down her throat. Eli wouldn't look away until she had forced down the entire half of her bagel. He thanked her but when she asked him where the bathroom was he ignored her question and wouldn't let her leave his sight. Although she could feel the ball of food sitting in her stomach, when Eli slipped his hand into hers she managed to ignore the uncomfortable feeling.

That first day was bliss. They walked through the city and just saw everything he demanded she see as part of the "new York experience," She was so tired and worn out by the end of the day as she lay in his bed with him.

"Cuh-lare, you have to stay awake to watch the movie," he whined playfully, but she was already asleep by this time. He on the other hand took out his laptop and began typing away.

_I loved her. I loved her more than the moon loved the stars. That wasn't even good enough though because I couldn't stand to be without her. Yet here she was, hiding from me in this idea of sleep. For how could she sleep without me when I needed her so. My heart, my body, my soul ached for her and yet she was denied to me because night had fallen. I would come for her again tomorrow as I would every day until death took one of us away._

_Tuesday_

Tuesday she had begged him to let her sleep, but in her best interest he had denied her that. Instead they went ice skating in Rockefeller center.

"I'm clumsy," she said trying to find a way out of this. He shook his head.

"No you're not, you're graceful and I'm here to catch you in case you fall." He told her. She squealed when her skate touched the ice.

"But what if you fall!?" She argued back, afraid of making a fool out of herself in front of all these people. As was becoming normal, he took her hand in his and she could feel how sturdy he was next to her. Absolute rock when she herself was shaking with nerves. He smiled at her and the sparks that were flying through his skin as she let out a delicious peal of laughter. "Eli!" She yelped as she began to lose her balance. She clung onto him for support and he gladly kept her standing.

"I'll never let you fall," he vowed. And underneath those words was so much more than either one of them realized. He, as it turned out, was an extremely talented ice skater. He managed to skate backwards as he pulled her forwards and she wanted to slap him for being so much better than her at well, everything.

"Why are you so good at this?" She queried as they skated around the beautiful tree.

"I was a hockey player," he admitted sheepishly. Her eyes widened in shock.

"Elijah Goldsworthy! A crazy murderer maybe? But a hockey jock?" She teased and he blushed his green eyes sparkled.

"I was really good at it until I realized I would have to spend so much time with neandarthals." He told her and she laughed again. He this time skated behind her, putting both hands on her waist and pushing her forwards.

"We're going too fast," She shrieked. Although she complained the entire time she had more fun in that afternoon than she had had in the past year. They stopped for pizza on the way to his apartment, again at his insistence and this time, because she was so hungry from ice skating she ate the entire slice. Eli did a little victory dance on the inside knowing they still had so much more to do before the week was up.

Again that night they lay in bed together, his bed now as it was bigger and more comfortable. She fell asleep her nose buried in a book. His book, although she didn't know it. He once again tucked her in under the covers but then typed away at another story, one he knew the blue eyed girl would love.

_You are the sun, please rise! Rise! For me my sweet come to me and love me as you have never loved anyone else! _

"_Are you there?" Her siren voiced called to me and I could not hide away, for I had no fear from her. I had to come to her now._

"_I am here. I will always be here." I promised. She graced me with her smile._

"_I promise one day I will be yours my love, only yours." She whispered her love words to me and my heart sped in my chest. If I were to die a thousand deaths the love within me would still keep my heart beating. For I loved her so._


End file.
